I have been vaguely suicidal for the last few weeks, and when I mention it people get Worried. And I have now wangled an appointment with a consultant psychiatrist, because as per the 8th or so GP I've been to in my surgery, I am now officially Too Hard to treat for someone who is not a specialist. Because the most commonly prescribed anti depressants give me bizarre side effects, or make me want to kill myself.
And having resigned from my job in August for the official reason of 'I would like to concentrate on my studies', I am now coming up hard on needing to submit the essays for my first term, and...I can't do it. I read it, and nothing comes in, and my lecturer makes helpful suggestions and my brain won't. One of my lecturers is being lovely and suggesting that I file a mitigating circumstances claim, but I'm not sure 'Sorry, I'm shit' will be accepted by the committee. And I have finally realised that, given how very shit I am at this, I should probably not go on and do an M.A. Which I have been dreaming of for years.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2014-11-23 09:20 pm (UTC)And having resigned from my job in August for the official reason of 'I would like to concentrate on my studies', I am now coming up hard on needing to submit the essays for my first term, and...I can't do it. I read it, and nothing comes in, and my lecturer makes helpful suggestions and my brain won't. One of my lecturers is being lovely and suggesting that I file a mitigating circumstances claim, but I'm not sure 'Sorry, I'm shit' will be accepted by the committee. And I have finally realised that, given how very shit I am at this, I should probably not go on and do an M.A. Which I have been dreaming of for years.